Interviewing Facebook

me:    Hi Facebook, nice to meet you in person!

fb:    Hi Ioanna! I feel i already know you in person! (hugs and kisses me)

me:   So how are you?

fb   Expanding! (huge smile of satisfaction)

me:   Right… Wanna tell me how old you are or is this information not public?

fb:   I was born on February 4, 2004 by Mark Zuckerberg, it’s all in my profile.

me:   How would you describe yourself in a few words?

fb:   Hm… online, free social network, the best of course! (giggling)

me:   So what exactly do you do?

fb:   I can host all the information about you and or your brand or company, all in one place. Information like contact numbers, photos, videos or everyday news and updates. And the best thing about me is that you can interact on a personal level with other people you acknowledge as friends.

me:   So how many people do you host?

fb:   I had about 900 million monthly active users this March

me:   WOW, that’s huge!!!

fb:   I know!!!

me:   You said i can interact with my friends?

fb:   Sure! You can post stuff on each other’s walls, like photos, videos and links, you can poke each other, visit each other’s farm, play pillow fight together, …

me:   ok, ok, i get it!

fb:   You see, you build your online personal image and hang out with your own community. Plus you can join pages of companies or singers and actors and automatically get their latest news!

me:   Right, so the next step is you making my morning coffee… What’s the drawback?

fb:   No drawback

me:   Come on Facebook! Admit it, you are not perfect! What’s the catch? What’s the most common mistake your users do?

fb:   Some people expand their personal community so much they end up having friends people they don’t even know. And hence can’t manage their relationships. Plus personal information security is a delicate matter, but Mark has it under control.

me:   Well, i have about 120 friends so i should be fine

fb:   I would say you are un-popular… 

me:   One last question for you, do you hang around with other social media?

fb:   Sure, we are good friends! I feel like we are related! Check my profile, i have pictures from my holiday in Santorini with twitter ant Pinterest! YouTube prefered Mykonos. LinkedIn was unfortunately too busy working… Did you know i also hang around with Instagram now?

me:   You mean you bought Instagram.

fb:   I don’t know about that, Mark takes care of the financial issues…

me:   Right. Do you have any other partner like that?

fb:   Sure! Monster is a pretty good friend of mine! We do business together!

me:   You are referring to BeKnown no?

fb:   Yeap! Not that i need it, i am already well known! (laughs) See, now i can even help you Branch Out and get a job!

me:   Oh my God you are full of applications! I don’t even know where to begin…!

fb:   You can throw me a pillow or send me a heart, i know deep down you love me!

me:   Don’t get your hopes up, i am just doing my job… Well Facebook thank you for your time, it was a pleasure talkig to you.

fb:   I ‘ll see you around! 😉

BackStage Peeks…

Facebook’s mobile kept ringing all the time during the interview and his reaction to the call was always “Don’t tell me! She did what???” What’s more i have to say he was quite nosy. My phone rang twice, both of the times he asked me who was it… None of your business!



18 thoughts on “Interviewing Facebook

  1. Pingback: Who is behind Google « life portOfolio

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